Coping with COVID Quarantine
To say that the last few months have been challenging, is greatly understating what we all have been going through. In my house we have experienced working at home together at our dinning room table, having to cancel all of our plans, being separated from our friends and family, constant worry about loved ones, losing a pet, caring for an elderly pet, divorces and one of us losing a job. All of this on top of everything going on outside of our four walls.
How are we all coping? How am I coping? My coping tools have changed as this experience has evolved. At first, free concerts in the living room via Zoom or a themed dinner where we pretended we were somewhere else, seemed to be all I needed to keep my spirits lifted. Then the isolation set in and I needed more. I am, by nature, a social butterfly. Being separated from my family, friends and co-workers for weeks that turned into months, was taking a toll on my emotional well-being. It became vital to set up distancing coffee, lunch and dinner dates. Some of which caused as much anxiety as they were meant relieve.
My art journal has been with me the entire time. I’ve tracked COVID case numbers, the changing of the seasons, and our limited outings. Immersing myself in the act of rendering a scene or object helped to make the world feel familiar and safe again. But the solace that my journal once brought, has also worn off.
So what is working now?
Diving head first back into my fine art roots, I’ve started to paint again. It has been ages since I’ve used my art supplies for pure emotional expression. I was nervous. Can I still do this? What if I fail? Not knowing how or if it would turn out, I got started. First, pencil on paper, writing down all my thoughts and fears. Knowing that I would cover these words with paint, I didn’t hold back. The honesty between me and the paper uncovered key words that informed the visuals. Then layers of acrylic paint, hiding most and highlighting some of the pencil marks. I then came in with pastels to bring back some linear elements. The paintings were chaotic, full of little movements that seemed to be working against each other more than with each other, much like some of my resent emotions and thoughts. I needed a bigger brush! I spent half a day searching through my supplies looking for a larger brush. I needed something that could make large sweeping movements across the pages, something to quiet the chaos. I found one! A cheap three inch foam brush, but it did the trick.
Through, mixed media on paper, 6 X 9 inches, July 2020
DARK | LIGHT | STUCK
Gateway, mixed media on paper,
6X9 inches,
July 2020
CONTROL | MOVEMENT | PASSAGE
Journey, mixed media on paper,
6X9 inches,
July 2020
STEPPING | LINK | PAINT
Move, mixed media on paper, July 2020
FREEFALL | LAND | UNABLE
These small works on paper helped me process my emotions and created a feeling of accomplishment. I’m sure I’ll look back on them in a year and see them completely different than I do today. I hope that my future self will be kind, understanding that these had a purpose that was greater than the end result.
This is how I’m coping today.